Friend or Foe? Good question.

I had heard from so many people that 3 would be much better than 2. So I was surprised when we started having issues. We seem to alternate between great days on which I enjoy every minute with this creative, thoughtful, and good-humored little person and horrid days in which *everything* is a battle – getting dressed, using the bathroom, getting into the car – and I can hardly wait to put my little adversary to bed for the night so that I can have a beer. After the first crazy week of highs and lows I mentioned our experience at my daughter’s school and got a recommendation for a developmental book about 3-year-olds.

The book is fittingly titled Your Three-Year-Old: Friend or Enemy by Louise Bates Ames and describes some of the issues we can expect to face during this year. Because it was written in 1980, some of the book’s advice is outdated. However, it’s been pretty good at describing some of the situations in which I’ve found myself. It seems that 3 is supposed to be rather easy, but 3 1/2 is a time of “disequilibrium” and is characterized by resistance to routine activities (particularly with the primary caregiver) and physical and emotional insecurity (especially anxiousness).

For whatever reason my little one seems determined to forego the normally calm and peaceful period between 3 and 3 1/2 and is rushing ahead to some of the more exasperating behaviors. In truth, I’ve been happy whenever she reached a milestone or acquired some new ability a bit “early”. However, this is one stage that I wish she would have skipped completely. Fortunately, the age of 4 is supposed to be much calmer . . . at least until 4 1/2.

Tara